I’m in Venice, a fabulous city except for one thing: no access to NBC. Try as I might, I can’t find a way to watch the SVU season premiere here. So forgive me if I post my blog about the show a couple days late. In the meantime, here’s a primer on what to expect during the first episode of Season 13!
Boy Meets Girl. There’s a new cast of detectives lined up for Season 13. (Elliot is gone and Olivia is only appearing part-time.) So how will the new girl and boy be introduced? Will they hate each other or will it be love-at-first-sight? Is she a control freak, and he an uncontrollable slob? Perhaps she’s a gourmet cook, and he’s always on a diet? One thing’s for sure, there’ll be plenty of …
Sexual Tension. The requisite ingredient for any Law & Order franchise. With actors this attractive, it shouldn’t be hard to pull off.
Police Brutality. If our new male detective is anything like Elliott, we can expect at least one suspect every three episodes to be roughed up while in police custody. Some suspect will doubtless have his constitutional rights violated during the premiere.
A Dent in the Foster Care System. If our new female detective is anything like Olivia, she’ll want to adopt every kid she works with. (A lot of us working in the system have this instinct, but Olivia seems to act on it more often.) There probably won’t be any adoption in the premiere (too soon), but I put the odds at 1 in 3 that our new Lady Detective will lose her heart to an orphan at some point during the season.
Vigilante Justice. Most SVU episodes seem to end with the rapist being killed by his victim. The manner of death varies– beating with a frying pan, stabbing with an exploding SCUBA knife, shooting in the central cellblock – but they all die. Personally, I’m hoping that the SVU writers will allow a few defendants to survive until trial, so we can actually see the justice system at work.
Amazing Technology. Our beloved SVU detectives seem to have an App to solve any crime. You guessed it – you can’t actually download any of those Apps today. Still, expect to see liberal use of an iPad on the premiere.
At Least One Catfight. I’m guessing the writers can’t resist at least one blowup between Olivia and the new woman. They probably have the self-restraint to stay away from mud wrestling and jello pools, but the rest of the world is fair game.
Have fun watching in real time, and I’ll catch up with you soon!
Terri Weiss says
19 September, 2011 at 5:05 amWell, I’m psyched, Ali – love your primer!
Why am I not feeling sorry for you, Hanging out in Venice in September (sigh)? Enjoy!!
Allison Leotta says
23 September, 2011 at 7:07 pmThanks, Terri! If it’s any consolation, I skipped several fabulous gelaterias in my search for Wi-Fi in Venice. Something about the water and the stone walls of the city make it the worst place on earch for Internet. Anyway, thanks for checking in. Hope you’re doing great!
Rob says
22 September, 2011 at 8:42 amI’ve seen it, I suspect you’ll be pleasantly surprised Allison!
Allison Leotta says
23 September, 2011 at 7:08 pmYou’re right, Rob — I was pleasantly surprised. No catfights at all! And I love ripped-from-the-headline plots.
Rob says
24 September, 2011 at 3:56 amGlad to hear you liked it! As superficial a change it was, I think the removal of all the ridiculously expensive and fancy gizmos, tv screens and iPads was the one I liked most. In addition to being unrealistic, I always felt it was like the detectives (and writers) were using a calculator and not showing their work, if you’ll pardon the weak analogy.
I have a question that perhaps you can answer. If the jury was deadlocked on the rape charge but not the more minor offenses, could the DA still retry the DSK clone on the rape charge? In theory of course, I assume that practically speaking the sensitivity of the matter combined with the expense of another long-shot of a trial would be prohibitive.
I’m finally getting around to ordering your book by the way. Look forward to reading it at the end of the semester when I get a break from contracts readings and waiting tables!
Allison Leotta says
24 September, 2011 at 1:27 pmI also liked that they stripped down the ridiculous technology. As for retrying the DSK figure on the deadlocked charges: yes, the DA’s office could do that. Whether they would want to is a different story (as you noted). I hope you like Law of Attraction! Best of luck with contracts and fourtops in the meantime!